Oh Bollocks...
Art // Jim // 23rd April 2007
Modern communications technology is growing at an astounding, almost exponential rate and the effect it is having on society is both profound and exciting:
- The incredible take-up of digital TV means extra choice for viewers. It is estimated that every 28 seconds a new channel is launched featuring people who failed to get on Big Brother fronting for premium rate phone competition lines.
- High speed broadband advancements means that a broader and better defined amount of hard-core pornography is instantly available to anyone who wants it. The state of the nations hedgerows has improved immeasurably.
- Social networking web sites are bringing people of all ages, racial and religious backgrounds together in unity to trash house parties on a scale that was previously thought unworkable.
- The abstract and depersonalised nature of E-mail, SMS and IM mean that people who have historically found it hard to develop relationships (such as animal fiddlers, nonces and sexual harassers) are now able to express themselves freely and without fear of society's ridicule.
- Multimedia phone messaging allows the immediate expression of ideas and news, such as me finding out that my constant procrastination regarding going on the big cool slides at the Tate modern has finally meant that they have taken the fucking things down before I got to have a go. Shit.
Comments
Is that picture for real? It looks like a model.
And why not just go to Butlins? You get added water there.
Right, that’s enough procrastination for me at least; it’s about time I finished that goatse/V-Tech mash-up I was working on…
Tom : 23/04/2007 22:52:18
I’m guessing there is an x missing there, kids.
Jim : 24/04/2007 01:20:49
I assure you there isn’t. Google it, dude. Just Google it.
Tom : 24/04/2007 09:07:42
It does look a little like you’d expect a scene post Bond visit circa 1960’s after he’s seen off all the men in white biochemical style suits.
Despite all that technology and communications knowledge I wasn’t sure whether your phone would receive photos.
Jane : 24/04/2007 20:46:40
You were right, my speak ‘n’ spell phone doesn’t do photos (or texting, or phone calls particularly well), I had to wait a couple of days to get to my clockwork computer with its coal-fired internet connection to download it from t-mobile.
The sense of tension in my cave was palpable - you could cut the air with a knife, that might have been because I put too much peat on the fire.
Obviously hoping for dubious home-made porn, some happy slapping montage or myspace house trashing footage I was mildly disappointed. Especially when I realised that I will never get the chance to elbow some little Tarquin or other out of the way to have a go at the big one on level four.
Also re: Bond I’d go for the carnage in The Spy Who Loved Me, when Roger Moore camply disposed of a whole load of boiler suited goons in a big oil tanker.
And re: goatse, yes my internet geek knowledge was not up to the whole bloke really holding his arse open a lot thing. I humbly apologise.
Jim : 24/04/2007 23:24:52